Petrelis Files

(Andrew Sullivan, on the left, with his husband Aaron Tone, at their wedding. Photo credit: Michael Stuetz.)

Slapping Sully Over Gay Marriage Rant

Hey Andrew,

You really pissed me off with a rant you posted on your blog last week, so much so that I've decided to respond to your unwarranted criticisms of gays in the fight to defeat Prop 8. You write:

Nate Silver studies the Prop 8 polling and labels it a toss-up:

I'd peg the 'no' side as about a 55/45 favorite, but not more than that.

Memo to the gays: wake up.

MP: We've been quite awake since 2000 when we lost so badly on Prop 22, an initiative that barred the state from recognizing gay marriages. The campaign on our behalf was the campaign that dare not say it was about gay marriage or gay people in California.

The most depressing aspect in the gay community has been the apathy of so many, as well as the energy and determination of so few.

MP: Where's the proof of the alleged apathy? There's really no need for you to echo the verbal bashing gays have received from the No on 8 leadership. Consider first the hundreds of gay couples who come out publicly and gotten hitched at marriage bureaus cross the state, and all the friends and family members of the couples.

Go and notice the millions of dollars raised, for the freaking most expensive proposition ever in America, to make the measure a loser with voters, along with all the outpouring of incredible volunteering happening here to relegate Prop 8 to the compost bin.

Maybe from DC you can't see the tremendous energy and organizing take place out here, but I wish you and the No on 8 brain trust would lay off the people who've poured heart, soul and money into the campaign.

So many straight people seem to be doing more for this issue than many gay people. That's unacceptable.

MP: Show me the data proving your contention. Are you all of a sudden an HIV epidemiologist with the SF DPH, willy-nilly making statistical claims without evidence? What do you see from Dupont Circle that I can't see from Castro Street, proving more straights are working on the defeat of Prop 8?

If there are more straights than gays working to stop the ballot measure, maybe it's because there are more of them then us. Also, the path to fully gay marriage equality is going to take lots of straights. I heartily welcome their valuable assistance in our fight.

And let's recognize the many gays who have legitimate reason to not be involved or donating to the campaign. I know a handful of gays in San Francisco who are so turned off by the invisibility of gay people in the No on 8 TV ads and over all lack of any effort to educate the voters about gay citizens, they are only committed to voting against the measure, and not endorsing or contributing money to a deeply offensive and closeted media effort by our side.

It's perfectly legitimate to expose the LDS [Latter Day Saints] campaign against civil rights; but the Mormons are working the system. The right response is to work it back.

MP: If only we were working the system to put gay peoples' live and loving relationships. A great opportunity to build on the saturation media coverage of May, when the state Supreme Court ruled in our favor, was lost because of fears of the consultants running the No on 8 effort.

Working the system, during this historic election season, to me as a gay man, meant showcasing gay couples, their families and out celebrities in our campaign's outreach media. Instead, we have the political consultants and official gay leaders shoving us back into a closet.

Donate here. But better still: call your family and friends in California and tell them why this matters.

I applaud all the links you provide to make a donation, but some might say you are apathetic because you've not held a fundraiser at a cafe or restaurant on Washington's Dupont Circle. It's not too late to hold a "Bloggers Against Prop 8" party and rattle a tin cup. Hint, hint.

If you live there, get organized. Canvass; campaign; volunteer; spread the word on the web. This is our Gettysburg. And we're losing it.

We are organized in so many beautiful ways, but I guess it costs to much for you and the No on 8 leaders to give all the amazing volunteers, activists and newlywed lovers some applause and positive reinforcement for all that we're doing in this battle.

If you truly believe we're losing the battle, consider asking your friends to contact Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger's two top PR consultants and tell them we want him to keep his pledge to fight the initiative.

Here’s the contact info:

Julie Soderlund, 916-551-1383

email: jsoderlund@wilsonmillercom.com.

Adam Mendelsohn, 916-444-1380,

email: amendelsohn@mercuryllc.com