No, this is not a responsive document released because I filed public records request. It's some of what may have crossed the mind of San Francisco's mayor, a man who gave his word to only be an interim occupant of City Hall's Room 200 which was of course a lie, about the recent show of anger by folks from and concerned about the Mission.
Much more humor and laughs and satires are needed to survive, stay sane and potentially thrive in the coming years, of more disfigurement and too much nonprofit mafia control of the "community" agenda in the Mission. Have a few chuckles and on to the spoof!
(Will the Mayor of San Francisco please raise his hand?)
Thank you for paying a visit on May 8th to our City Hall and exercising your First Amendment rights, while judiciously cooperating with law enforcement agencies during your time in the building and refraining from being arrested.
The choreography and stage-management of your rally on the Charlotte Shultz Grand Staircase, yes, that is the official designation of the staircase, looked wonderful on TV reports and across social media. So colorful and multilingual. Congratulations on 15 minutes of social media fame.
I commend you for picking the slowest workday of the week for your visit and that you didn't disrupt any hearings. The City Family counts on you to not show up on a Tuesday when the Board of Supervisors meet, and if you do it's not to engage in civil disobedience such as what happened in Oakland last week.
Marching around in a few loops on the second floor was a wonderful way of getting your cardio workout for the day and building an appetite. I understand that while I was enjoying a private, catered luncheon with my good friend and adviser Ron Conway, you dined on pizza outside my office and dutifully cleaned up after yourselves.
That you didn't form affinity groups, each holding an open-mic sessions or calmly stating a case of doable action for my Office of Housing Opportunity, Partnerships and Engagement, Office of Housing, Office of Neighborhood Development, the Office of Public Policy and Finance and the Department of Public Works, all located in City Hall and under my control, is a deficit you may want to debrief about.
While your shouting did reach the ears of staff in those offices, you were wise to not stage any theatrics or risk arrest inside their place of business because it went on as usual.
One of your key demands is to stop evictions, but no activists sat-in at the Sheriff's Office, which is responsible for removing tenants from property when required by law.
My City Hall staff and reelection campaign consultants, especially the public relations and communications experts, are breathing a sigh of deep relief that you didn't and are not showing up at my daily photo-ops. It would greatly displease us all if you were to press your demands when I'm cutting a ribbon or smiling for the cameras.
We also are happy no activists show up at the many City-funded parties I host at City Hall with much municipal monies for our socialite friends, foreign diplomats and tech titan who enrich San Francisco with their business-friendly agendas.
On behalf of my family, we're glad you stayed away from our home and have no plans to organize an Occupy encampment in front of where I comfortably sleep every night.
Now that your short action has concluded, I ask for your votes this November!
Your Mayor,
Ed Lie
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