Petrelis Files

SF Mayor Asterisk Zapped 
at Gay Museum Opening

Mayor Asterisk got zapped Thursday night at the opening of the gay museum in the Castro, and I can now say I know what Ed Lee looks like when he is deeply pained. He had just cut the ribbon outside the storefront museum, and was no more than 4 feet away from me when I zapped his media-op. My loud message that he could not ignore: 'No more back room deals! No more backroom deals!' The mayor was not happy with me.

Only his second full day as the titular mayor, and already heckled. Democracy, and the subverting of it in the now-banana republic of San Francisco, demand a voluble addressing of how we got the interim leader we must contend with until November's election.

It was a night of repeating that phrase, sometimes loudly, not just at Mayor Asterisk, who, like Barry Bonds will always have an asterisk and questions associated with his ascension to the top of the heap and the process that got him there, but at other pols including my pal Bevan Dufty and his mayoral campaign manager.

I told Bevan we need to know what he's getting out of the deal that was cut for Ed Lee, and he denied there was any backroom deal or that he got anything out of it. Bevan said all my talk about backrooms made him think of sexual sleaziness. Yeah, okay, but I intend to dog him about his role in the screwed up process.

That massive ego Cleve Jones tried to approach and speak with me, but I shooed him away with both of my limp wrists blowing outward and he smartly moved on.

When I saw Supervisor David Campos and repeated my chant, he gave me an honest smile and said, "You're right." Yeah, he has a clue, plus he can publicly admit a damn deal went down, but I  wanna see how he'll craft an effective response to the shadiness of Rose Pak, Willie Brown and Steve Kawa. Show me the way, David, my Latino gay brother, to progressive political redemption.

Who else did I single out for an earful? Mayoral wannabee and current city attorney Dennis Herrera, who when Steve Kawa said jump on drafting legislation that would allow Ed Lee to become interim mayor, then get his old job and pay and benefits package back, despite what the city charter says, Herrera asked how high. His response to my demand for no more backroom deals? "Michael, you are so wrong about what happened. There was no deal." Yeah, and I'm gonna win an Oscar this year for best gay zapper.

One fun part of the evening was being surrounded at one point by four of the most adorable young gay men, two of whom I know. Jackson Bowman with the Elizabeth Taylor eyes from the HIV prevention council and his furry-faced friend Marcus. They appreciated my zapping of the pols and had the best laughter I heard all night.

After a while, other friends opined on the City Hall crapola of the past month or so, and also suggested counter-chants. "No more bathroom deals!" was suggested by Rafael Mandelman, who ran for the District 8 seat and lost. Guys I didn't know endorsed backrooms for gay sex and just more sex in general for the gay community.

Memo to the pols who lust after Room 200 at City Hall: The electorate you face is very familiar with ranked choice voting. Get ready for a new kind of mayoral race.